Things...

I was born on the first day of March in the year of our Lord 1900 and 80. I am the only boy and I've always wanted brothers. I was the last child my parents had but due to a unique comraderie that is present on Birchfield it was almost as though I had several. Joe, who I charge with being my Spanish/Italian brother. Brandon, who was born a year to the day after me. Mahdi, who is my workout partner and also like a little brother to me. I've helped him with his relationships and bench presses alike. Finally there Ivory. I've known Ivory longer than any of the others and we are welcome in each other's homes just like we live there. I'm getting married in February and only two of them are in the wedding I feel as if I've betrayed the other two.

I'm closer to my friends than I am to my family. The funny thing is that my family and I are kinda like Voltron (you'll remember this if you grew up in the 80's) in that we are all seperate and scattered but the second someone's in need of assistance we all come together to form something that is simply inconquerable. I would like to have a better relationship with everyone, but hey this is what works.


I feel that my short temper is returning. I like that. I need to "be on edge", my life goes much smoother. A little pain/anger keeps you striving. I feel like the second you get too happy, you stop trying. I'm never content. I know what I'm capable of so with that being said I'm not happy with anything short of excellence. If not going to be the best it doesn't make sense to try.

This was the first Christmas that I've ever spent alone. My dog spent the better part of the day sleeping. My "best man" spent the better part of his day with his girlfriend. I'm alright though. I needed this day to finally adjust from depending on others for ANYTHING to depending on myself.

Prior to my moving to Texas, my personality was exactly the same as it is becoming once again. For the better part of the 15 months I'd grown to be rather pussified. That doesn't work for me. Anger and frustration fuel me.